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Take charge of your life and start breaking Bad Habits today

By Ralph E. Moore Jr., Special to the AFRO

We all have at least one bad habit. We all have that one thing we need to stop or start doing, whether it’s overeating, oversleeping, overspending, drinking too much, or gossiping. “How do you break a bad habit?” is a question that many of us face. “How do you make it stick?” you ask once you’ve broken one.

The conventional wisdom holds that in order to break bad habits, they should be broken down into small parts, which include triggers, practice, and rewards. There should also be a step-by-step procedure for breaking a bad habit. The process of behavior modification (yes, that’s what it is) starts with determining what you want to focus on.

1. Explain the bad habit. Do you struggle with overeating, not returning phone calls from loved ones or friends, not exercising, or spending beyond your means? The first step in gaining control of a bad habit is to call it out! Don’t beat around the bush about your bad habit; instead, confront it.

2. Be accurate. “What causes a bad habit?” is the question. Are there any red flags? For example, do you eat a lot of snacks because you buy too many at the supermarket and bring them home? Do you over-watch television because you don’t have any good books? Is boredom the catalyst? Is loneliness a real thing? Is it possible to be lazy? Define the problem and figure it out so you can solve it!

3. Determine solutions! Excessive television viewing can be remedied by purchasing books, board games, or puzzles. Take a hard look at yourself and conduct a thorough self-examination of what’s going on in the area of your life where bad habits appear. In our example of excessive television viewing, the solution is to find another way to entertain oneself. The solution is to replace one habit with a more productive one.

4. List the negative consequences of your bad habit and the positive outcomes that would result from changing your behavior. Have you ever sat down and considered how overspending or overeating negatively impacts your life? Write down all of the ways your bad habit is affecting your life, regardless of the specific issue. Is a lack of sleep causing you to be irritable in front of family, friends, and coworkers? Consider how much you could gain by making a positive change. Make a list of all the positive ways your life could flourish if you stopped doing the things that are keeping you from truly thriving.

5. Reminders can help you stay on track. Use your cell phone’s alarm to remind you when to go to bed and when to wake up. Staying up too late can become a bad habit. Set your alarm, go to bed when it goes off, and stick to your plan! If you can find a buddy to join your effort to improve—someone you can call or text when you feel vulnerable—your chances of breaking the bad habit will improve. Misery enjoys company, but so does self-improvement. Use the buddy system to encourage, remind, and challenge your buddy to keep going or do better.

6. Reward yourself along the way. Positive reinforcement is said to be more effective than negative reactions.

7. Speak with a professional. If all else fails, call in the professionals! Carolyn Opher Mozell is a leadership development coach who has worked with former Mayors Sheila Dixon and Jack Young of Baltimore. She has held various senior positions, including chief of staff. Leaders Who Connect and Inspire, LLC is Mozell’s two-year-old company. She teaches clients how to improve themselves.

According to Mozell, “self-awareness is the foundation of emotional maturity” and is required when breaking bad habits for the sake of self-improvement. “Emotional intelligence, particularly as it relates to the individual,” she said, is required for progress. Mozell believes that “self-confidence, as well as working on oneself, is important to achieving success.”

The time has come to devise a strategy! Seek advice on how to break your bad habit today. If necessary, seek the advice of a professional along the way. As you strive for success, lean on your support network. The bottom line is to keep trying.

The views expressed on this page are those of the authors and do not necessarily reflect those of the AFRO.

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